I was looking at an almost empty page of my journal. Searching that maybe I have tried to muster the courage to write what once was. But then again, I did. I wrote my soul out. I remember each and every memory, smiles and pains. I wanted to grab the car keys and run away forever. But running away meant I have given up a battle that has already been foretold.
There are days meant to unfold and tell us something of what's about to happen. I was thankful, that despite the pain I have been through, my prayers never goes unanswered.
Few years back, I was asking for a closure that I thought would never be given. Two nights ago, it came. I used to dream of the house in the middle of a forest, with a little kid, a guide, to tell me of what to do. The memories replaying night by night. What happened was meant to be forgotten, but they replayed in my heart and there are nights when I cry myself to sleep and wishing that one day, I would never wake up. My dreams show of me of anguish and pain, of pointing fingers, who to blame and who has to leave. But that night in question proved to me otherwise, that I in my own sense, have found the closure I needed. He's finally happy for me. For the first time in two years, he has told me, that I have made a great choice and that he's happy for me. No more haunting me of what could've been, and should have been.
Now I face the future with a smile in my face. This is my year. Like what the song Here Comes Goodbye by Rascal Flatts say, goodbye has come for my past.
There are days meant to unfold and tell us something of what's about to happen. I was thankful, that despite the pain I have been through, my prayers never goes unanswered.
Few years back, I was asking for a closure that I thought would never be given. Two nights ago, it came. I used to dream of the house in the middle of a forest, with a little kid, a guide, to tell me of what to do. The memories replaying night by night. What happened was meant to be forgotten, but they replayed in my heart and there are nights when I cry myself to sleep and wishing that one day, I would never wake up. My dreams show of me of anguish and pain, of pointing fingers, who to blame and who has to leave. But that night in question proved to me otherwise, that I in my own sense, have found the closure I needed. He's finally happy for me. For the first time in two years, he has told me, that I have made a great choice and that he's happy for me. No more haunting me of what could've been, and should have been.
Now I face the future with a smile in my face. This is my year. Like what the song Here Comes Goodbye by Rascal Flatts say, goodbye has come for my past.
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